Ever since I was small, I hated myself. I also hated glass,mirrors, and just about anything else that cast a reflection.My life I thought was just as ugly and complicated. It was family oriented. I was never popular.As a matter fact it led up to me losing just about everything. Friends,family, and the little securities life offers most people as it starts.Where swiftly taken away from me as a late teenager. Because I was a girl forcing my self to fit in as a man. until I just couldn’t take it any more.I planned to kill myself.I tried at-least 8 times until i realized being my self is a whole lot less violent.
Well that is what I thought until the entire world made it it’s very mission to prove me wrong.
I think keeping the T on lbgt is hurting us by association.I understand having as many allies as possible is important. At times our struggles can be quite similar and quite a few transfolk are gay themselves.Yet, we as a group need to show we have several of our own perils not intertwining with homosexuality. That being trans isn’t just the hyper-feminine version of homosexuality most assume it is.
Not to mention many LGB are just as ignorant as their heterosexual counterpart.Which is sad because i’m literally forced share a culture with a group of people who don’t share my medical concerns, rejections, or even understand why those things might even be problems or care.
Please be aware these are just my opinions.
I can’t tell if I’m wrong for having limited trust. I don’t know if never lifting my guard is bad.But what I do know is every time I’ve tried someone has hurt me.Someone close to me has unconsciously placed me in situations where my safety has been challenged. I’m paranoid and unhappy. But at least I’m safe and alive.
Trans-life is the very honest story of how I got to this point. How I went from a optimistic young woman to a drug abuser.Who is probably going to kill her self in a few years.I need an outlet desperately.So I chose blogging a series of post in attempt to relate to the outside world.My name is Emptee, and its nice to meet anyone who bothered to read.